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This song is about the temperature being lower than one would prefer


I'm Alchav, sitting in my room collecting large amounts of pay
I'm selling my records way too overpriced because that's the Alchav way
But even though I have a zillion dollars I am quite displeased
Because it's freaking cold out and I don't like to freeze
We've got nothing to burn, not even one log
So I'm sitting here freezing listening to "Get a Real Dog"
I wish I had some hot tea or something, yes that's what I'm dreaming
But I'm just sittin' here, swearing, yelling, and screaming

I'm cold!
I'm cold!
I'm cold!
I'm cold!

My thick sweater isn't doing the trick
So I just have to ask, what the frick?
Why don't you turn the thermostat up?
I ask you if you aren't cold as well and you say "yup"
So I'll make some hot chocolate to keep me warm
At least there isn't a freightning storm
My shoulder hurts, and there's a hair on my soap
And we're all out of Coke! But right now with what I cannot cope

I'm cold!
I'm cold!
I'm cold!
I'm cold!

I suppose this is what I was begging for back when it was hot
But I'm shaking, shivering and spasticating a lot
There are 2 huge icicles coming out of my nose
I'm about to die because my whole body is frozed
Singing this song isn't really going to help
I wish I could be visited by a magical heat elf
Who would cure me of my low body heat
But that'll never happen so I'll just scream to this beat

I'm cold!
I'm cold!
I'm cold!
I'm cold!


from In Stereo, released October 1, 2007


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Soggy Potato Chips Grand Rapids, Michigan

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