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This is a completely true story. I gave up very quickly trying to make anything rhyme because I didn't want to have to change any factual information. The first instrument you hear is a simple sine wave put through a series of distortion and reverb VSTs. I love how it turned out.


Once upon a time in the mid-to-late 90's
I looked into the fridge, there was one yogurt left
I asked my mom, "Can I have the last yogurt?"
She said "No you can't that wouldn't be fair"
A couple hours later I went into my mom's room
I saw my brother in the dark he said "Go away"
I said I don't have to and I turned on the light
And I saw my brother on the bed eating the last yogurt

I said "hey you're not supposed to eat the last yogurt
I was really hungry but mom didn't let me have it"
I ran out to tell my mom, "he ate the last yogurt"
He followed me out and my mom looked nervous
It wasn't long at all before my brother confessed
My mom told him that he could have the last yogurt
She told him to hide so that I wouldn't see
That she told my brother that he could have the last yogurt

I couldn't believe what I was hearing
My heart just melted down into my feet
How could she let him have the last yogurt
It's been a decade and I still hold a grudge
I wanted some delicious yogurt so badly
Why couldn't she let me have the last yogurt
Every time I see a yogurt, the nightmares come back
Of my mom giving my brother the very last yogurt


from Extra Cheese, released September 7, 2021


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Soggy Potato Chips Grand Rapids, Michigan

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